The Problem
Imagine getting into a taxi and just sitting there in silence. Do you think you will get to where you’re hoping to go? Not likely. Imagine walking into an office building or a factory and just sitting at a desk or standing next to the time clock in silence. Do you think you’ll get the job done? Not likely.
And yet we sit in silence in the same small group, the same worship gathering, or the same Bible class with another Christian against whom we are nursing a grudge, an issue, a complaint. We don’t say anything, but we’re expecting resolution, expecting change, expecting an apology ?and it never happens. And we’re surprised. Then we get mad because the church should be different.
The Solution
Agreed. Church should be different. A healthy church is built upon healthy relationships, and healthy relationships are built upon communication. The only way the church is going to be different is if the body is healthy. But if the different parts of the body aren’t connecting, then the body cannot be healthy.
If you want the church to be different, we have to communicate with each other. The church in Thessalonica was a body of new believers who were experiencing persecution and who needed encouragement to stick together. Paul wrote this note to them in 1 Thessalonians 5:13-18: “Live in peace with each other. And we urge you, brothers, warn those who are idle, encourage the timid, help the weak, be patient with everyone. Make sure that nobody pays back wrong for wrong, but always try to be kind to each other and to everyone else. Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”
We can’t expect a difference in the church if we aren’t going to do anything different within the church. The world is full of deception and self-centeredness. The world is also willing to give up on other people if they have even the slightest negative experience. That shouldn’t be the life of the church. That isn’t the body that Jesus died to save.
The Challenge
While you might be “content” to keep quiet about the situation, you can’t be a healthy part of the body, and you run the risk of making the rest of the body unhealthy. Jesus said in Matthew 5:23, 24: “If you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift.” You can’t come to church with a grudge against your brother or sister in Christ and expect to be right with God.
Break the cycle. Bridge the gap. Talk it out.